The thing I always think I am incapable of having, has come to me

Still to my disbelieve, I think its beginning. But where will it lead to? What will it be like?

A Place To Call My Own

Its been a hectic 1 month for me, juggling between jobs, assignment and looking for a place to stay. So I apologize, my dear friends for not updating my blog.

Today have been a lucky day for me because I've finally managed to rent a place. Its a partly furnished studio apartment and its situated at a very convenient area. Only 5 minutes walk from Soon's place. I've never thought I'd be able to get it actually because it all happened too suddenly. I only found out about the inspection this morning itself when I went online. But lucky for me the agent said he preferred me than this other German girl (who actually has already put in the deposit for the place) so he's leasing it to me. But of course I'd have to pay $5 extra each week so instead of the asking price $200 a week I'd have to pay $205 a week.

The studio is a funny little place because the bathroom is actually situated outside instead of inside. So I'd have to walk around half naked on the balcony to get the toilet everyday. Not complaining because that place is really a good deal. I've seen quite a few other places and they are all crappy and expensive. The only thing is, I haven't got a bed in the new place so I can't move in just yet. Silly Soon said he'll loan me the bed and when everyone's asleep at night we'll carry the bed together back to my new place. Sometimes I wonder what goes on in that big head of his. Just the other day when we (Soon, Ross and me) were having yum cha for lunch at Marigold he said this to Ross; 'You know, actually Chinese are very smart. Just by using 2 sticks and our finger we can manage to create chopsticks but westerners only know how to use fork, so easy! Just poke poke poke. Chinese can make use of everything around them to create something new or to replace something that they lack of. For example if girls need to make-up and they ran out of eye shadow they can use the Tumeric powder as eye shadow. See! So smart!'. Seriously, what the hell is wrong with this guy?? He could just come out with anything.

I'm really happy with my life here at the moment...minus the few stressful moments when u have to think about money and work. It really is different when you have to rent a place urself, pay for the rent and bills etc etc....It really is different from when you're living at home with parents. But its all good.....it feels like an adult hahehehea.

So that's all the time I have folks. Will update again soon.

Woot Woot!!

Daren Hayes is performing in BX tonight and I'll be working! WooHoooo~!! Its like getting paid to watch Daren Hayes....hehehe. Ross said his partner will be there I wonder how he looks like.

Not Perasan La....

I have a feeling Mr. Chef (one of the chefs at BX) likes me. It's an instinct... the way he always tries to get me to notice him, annoys the hell out of me just so that i could talk to him, stealing glimpses of me when he thinks im not looking. However, 50% of the people in BX hates him because he's a dickhead. My feeling towards him is confused. Sometimes I think he's a nice guy....but sometimes when he really annoys me I loathe him....sometimes he can be very obnoxious and rude and then I feel like punching him right at the face.

Anyone has any idea how I could test him out and see if he really is interested in me?

Today I made new friends....

:)

1. CC from Singapore
2. Miso from Japan
3. Han from Sri Lanka
4. Libby from China
5. Lissy from China
6. EL from China

now we all have each other's phone number so I can consider them friends....It feels like primary school again......

On What's Been Happening

It's been ages I know since I last blogged. Not that I do not have anything to write about but because I'm using Ross's laptop to do it, it just doesn't feel right. Life's really good here and I'm so glad to be here. Uni only started yesterday so I've been doing nothing but 'playing' for the past one month.

Talking about Uni, I've always thought Malaysia or Asian countries are the biggest player in the hierachichal social status but apparently Australia does it too. For starters, my first Professor said he gives priority to his Postgrad students for consultation. He doesn't like Undergrads (Actually I find that offensive because I have once been an Undergrad Student) So anytime we wanna see him he'd be more that happy too. Today as I was walking towards the Uni bookstore ( I need to get a reader for Thursday) I realised the queue is nearly 2 km long but because I needed the book I had to join in the line. As it was nearing my turn which is about half hour waiting in line, I saw a special sign next to my queue which says 'Postgrads Priority Only' which has only 3 person in line! Can't believe how stupid I was waiting in line for 30 minutes.

Anyway, got a job and the pay is fantastic. Will upload pictures soon.

The Art of Kissing

So there we were the 3 of us having a drink at our usual place and the full detail of what transpired this conversation I cannot remember

He: Have you guys encountered anyone who really suck at kissing?
Me: Oh my god yes!! It's so disgusting just to think of it.
She: Really?? I've never....all my partners were pretty alright
He: Wow you've been really lucky...
Me: Yeah man....so lucky
She: What do you mean by bad?? How is it like?
Me: You wouldn't want to experience it...
He: I had this girl....she was so bad.....my face was wet all over
Me + She: Eeeewwww Gross!
He: Hehehehe yup.....it was horrendous....I was like 'keep your tongue babe....I don't need you to help me wash my face' and then you smell her saliva on you....Teehehehe
Me+She: *sweat*

Yay!

Visa approved! Chop, Sign, till April 2009! AaAaahhh Life is Wonderful~! 3 more weeks and I'll be gone from Malaysia!

p/s: Soon has been bragging about his 'beautiful' house and the fountain he built. He's also taking me to this 'wonderful' Laosian restaurant (which he can't stop talking about) on the night I'm ariving. Fingers crossed that everything he said is true to his words.

Krazy is the word

Once upon time, there was a friend. Now this friends lives in a lovely neighbourhood in Bandar Utama. One fine day, a middle aged married couple decided to move in right next to them. Everything was going very well the first few months. They exchanged friendly greetings, friend's mum will sometimes have a short chit-chat while hanging out clothes to dry.

Suddenly, all hell broke loose. New neighbour decided that they could no longer live like a normal human being and decided to torment friend and the neighbourhood. After much analysis from witnessing and experiencing first hand on how she torments the neighbourhood, we've come to a conclusion that new neighbour suffers from psychological disorder; mainly ------> Aggression, Schizophrenia, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and Bipolar Disorder.

To know more about new neighbour's bizzare behaviour please click this and then this

Have a good night!

Sydney here I come!

I know I haven't been blogging for quite some time. Well...for those who know me I'm not the biggest fan of writing....sometimes I get lazy and then I procrastinate and etc. Nothing much has been happening lately except for the fact that I'll be leaving for Sydney on the 9th Feb and I'm in the midst of getting all my stuffs ready.

Many have been asking when I'll be back and honestly I myself do not know. So what I usually say is "when my passport expires in 2011". My plan is to try and stay in Sydney for as long as I can and if I can't stay, my next stop would be New Zealand, and then if I still can't find a way to stay I'll pop over to England.

Soon mentioned that David Alice (mutual friend of mine in Sydney but good friend of his) is willing to rent his place to me and it will be fun because he said David will then take me along with him to all the Art Exhibitions. Why Art Exhibitions because apparently David is the Director of Art Muzeum for University of Sydney. But the rent is about AUD150 a week and honestly I don't know if I can afford to pay that much. The area that David is staying is considered one of the 'rich' areas and he is living in a double story town house. He's taking the lower floor and is planning to rent the top floor to me. Soon has told me not to worry because he has already reserved a place for me to work in Jay Jay where he and Alice are currently working and they are paying AUD18++ an hour on weekdays and AUD20++ an hour on weekends. If its still not enough to cover for my expenses I'll probably work at night as well in a restaurant or something.

On another note, my medical check-up report is making me worried because the panel doctor has yet to submit the report to the immigration department. It'll take the Aus government a minimum of 14 working days to process my visa and I don't have much time left until the 9th. I'm crossing my fingers that I'll get my visa by then.

I'm heading back to bed now. Till then!

Hey Papa....

“Are you free?” Mummy asked as I answered the phone. I was having lunch with Shir on a normal Tuesday afternoon. “Why?” I asked. “Nothing. Just wanted to chit chat with you” she said. The moment she said that I knew something was wrong because she has never called just to chat with me. “Huh?? You called just to chit chat with me? No way. What is it? I’m having lunch with my colleague” I said. “Hehehe…Nothing just wanted to tell you your dad just met with an accident. A Prado hit the back of the car as he was trying to make a U-turn at Taman Tun”. “What?!?” I shouted. “Is he okay? Was it bad?”. “He’s fine. Just that the whole trunk is gone. The other car was speeding and your dad was driving quite slowly so I guess he couldn’t brake on time and he hit the back of the car. I’m waiting for him to come back now. Hehehe…. Anyway just wanted to tell you that’s all”.

As I was walking into the kitchen later that night, Daddy said “I need you to go to the police station with me”. “I thought you’ve already reported this afternoon?” I asked. “Not yet” he replied. Most of the journey to the police station was quiet. Minus the few moments when he was telling me not to drive too near to the car in front just in case they brake suddenly and I’ll bang into them.

When we were at the Police Station, it suddenly hit me how old my dad has become. Mind you my dad is 60 and he still goes for his twice a week badminton session. He makes fantastic food and is always happy telling me how he made certain dishes and what sort of ingredients he used. Now at the station, he no longer stand straight but hunching a little while walking around not sure whether to fill in the form first or to wait for the Police on duty to call for his turn. I took the form and told him he needs to fill it up and give it to the Police.

When it was our turn to report, I realized the reason why he wanted me to be there with him was because we needed to type the report onto the computer ourselves. Unlike a few years back, the police no longer sits and writes for you. While waiting for the Sergeant, I remembered how he used to be the one taking me to the Police Station when I lost my IC, how he arranged for my driving lessons, buying me my air ticket when I was flying to Australia, carrying me into the car and drove me to the doctor when I was having measles because I was too sick to walk, and all the little little things a responsible father would do. Taking us all out for family trip, driving to some god forsaken place for a what he would say “extremely good food where you can’t find anywhere in KL” Every time I’m out with my friends he would sit at his chair waiting for me to come home because I’m constantly home late. The moment he hears the gate he would stand up and walk to the front door with keys in his hands and open up the door for me.
Now, he’s constantly going to the toilet (one of the signs of old age), slowly losing his focus and always forgetting things.

My dad has never been a man with many words. We never share hugs, nor do we tell each other how much we love each other (normal, being in a traditional Chinese family). Even without all these, I know for a fact that he does love me and the family very much from the things he does, and the way he cares for us. 10 years down he would be 70 and I, 34. I’m afraid to even think of how he would be like, then. Will he still be driving around? Will he still be in the kitchen trying to cook his ‘signature’ dishes? Will he still be saying the same old thing he has been saying for the past 15 years ‘Stop coming home so late. Stop spending so much money. Stop driving so fast.’?

But one thing I know for sure that will never change, is the passion we both share for cooking, how alike we actually are in personality no matter how much we try to deny it, how we annoy the hell out of one another due to both our stubbornness, and that he would always be my father, my hero, my role model, and I, the rebellious, stubborn, annoying eldest daughter that will never grow up in his eyes.

Indescent proposal

How do one deals with the situation when a good friends asks you if you'd sleep with them. Bearing in mind both of you are of the same sex(in this case I'm a girl and she's a girl) and she's adamant that she would like to try it out with you. Not because she's a lesbian, but because it is one of her fantasies to sleep with a woman and she would like to experience how it is like to 'lick a p**sy'(literally). In addition, she would like her boyfriend to be in it as well if you're willing, if not he just watch. or if you're still not willing, she'd lock him out and its just a one - to - one (you and her).

The first time she proposed i brushed it off because she was not very direct. It came very subtly and seemed like a joke. The second time it was straight-on right at the face. Today I spoke to her she said she liked me. Part of me felt honoured but the other part of me felt disgusted. How do I turn her down without offending her? At the first place, is it wrong to ask a friend for a favor like that?

I have friends who feel that it is not wrong. They say that this is because subject and me are friends and since she can't just try it out with any tom, dick, and harry, the best person to try it out with is a friend whom she trust. But then again, since she's a friend, how could you even do it and when everything is over, pretend like nothing has ever happened? Will there be a difference towards our friendship? Are we going to start using one another for sex just because we can?

What kind of friendship is this then?

*Billy once told me this scandalistic story when I was in Australia:

He: You know *Linnie and *Lannie are best friends right (*names changed to protect their privacy)

Me: Yeah why?

He: There was one period when they were both single. They just broke up with their boyfriend I think about a month and they were both feeling very horny.

Me: *eyes wide open and fearing for the worst* AND?

He: So they decided since they were both horny and they can't get any guys to f**k they might as well f**k each other.

Me: *jaw nearly dropping to the ground* BUT THEY ARE BOTH BEST FRIENDS! AREN'T THEY DISGUSTED? THEY'VE KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR QUITE SOME TIME RITE? DON'T THEY FEEL EMBARASSED? Imagine....the thought of kissing, licking and sucking your bestfriend's t*ts and p**sy!! EEeeewwww

He: Don't know....they were both very horny wurt....so might as well.... but it was a one off thing...after that they decided it was a stupid thing and they should not do it again. They are both still very close though..... hehehe

Me: ..............

So do these things actually happen? Am I over-reacting? Is this then, still considered as a purely 'platonic' relationship?

The most boring, no-brainer job in the whole wide world........

is telemarketing.

And I'm in it. *faints*

Blogging Time....

A friend was complaining that I hardly ever update my blog. Problem is, I hardly ever go online other than during at work. Don't ask me why, I don't know. It will never occur to me just go online and chat and then blog. Most of the time when things happen to me I 'think' I want to blog about it. Come the time when I get home and I can go online, I don't 'think' I wanna blog about it anymore because I might have already lost all the excitement of writing about it.

I always wonder how some bloggers can keep in mind what they want to blog about and then blog about it maybe 1 month later. Hell I can't even remember things that happened to me 2 weeks before. I guess I just don't have the passion to write like they do. But once in a while I do get the urge to blog. Like now. And I'm at work. Hehe

random questions to past time

Got this off Pinky... Since I no longer need to slave myself for work I have alot of time to do things like this...hhehe

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?
Audrey...

2. At what time do you go to sleep?
Depends whether its Mahjong night or not...

3. How many times have you spoken French?
Does Je ne sais pas count?

4. Have you ever drunk milk straight out of the carton?
I don't drink milk

5. Have you ever won a spelling bee
Surprisingly I have

7. How fast can you type?
I don't know....but people who has seen me type saysI'm fast

8. Are you afraid of the dark?
Very

9. Eye color?
errrr.....brown?

11. The worst ex you’ve had?
The one that ate my cherry and cheated my money

12. Do you knock on wood?
All the time.... I need the luck

13. Are you drinking anything right now?
nope!

15. Can you hoola hoop?
Can't la....the hoop wouldn't stay up

16. Are you good at keeping secrets?
I donchickeno...try telling me some

17. What do you want for Christmas?
cash!!! just give me cash!!

18. Do you know the Muffin Man?
Do you know the purple potato?

19. Do you talk in your sleep?
Yeah, I give out 4D numbers....come sleep with me

20. Who wrote the book of love?
Grandpa Moon....Go to Seremban and look for him

21. Have you ever flown a kite?
only once... :(

23. Do you consider yourself successful?
Will answer in 5 years

24. How many people are on your contact list ofyour cell?
Don't know....lost count

25. Have you ever asked for a pony?
No...I've always asked for a dog

26. Plans for tomorrow?
Make-up for Cindy, Dinner and Mahjong...hehe

28. Missing someone now?
Does Clay Aiken count?

31. How are you feeling today?
Extremely good!

32. Are you happy?
Very!

33. Have you ever been suspended or expelled from school?
Fortunately I was always given second chance

34. What are you looking forward to?
Going back to Australia....

34. Have you ever crawled through a window?
No...there's always the door

35. Have you ever eaten dog food?
yes I have....I was naive enough to believe a friend when she says its edible and she eats it all the time

36. Can you handle the truth?
i donchickeno...try me

37. Do you like green eggs and ham?
Do you like purple potato and orange yam?

38. What 3 things you always bring with you to places?
money, ciggarate, mobile
39. Do you like or have a crush on anyone right now?
errr....Clay Aiken?

40. How many kids do you plan to have?
4!! 2 boys and 2 girls
41. What do you do when no one is watching?
Talk to myself

42. Do you talk to yourself?
Refer above

43. Is there something you want that you can't have?
Many!

44.Three physical features of the opposite sex that you first notice?
Their teeth, their eyes, their smile

45.Who are you thinking about right now?
C*Ba* Soon

46. Who did you last hug?
Audrey....

47. Where is your phone?
In front of me...

48. What was the last thing you ate?
Cornflakes

49. What do you want to do?
Re-write my personal statement

50. Would you ever date anyone on your friendslist?
never say never....

51. What TV Show do you watch?
Anything on Travel and Living

52. What is your cell num?
012 - 755 2525

I am officially...

Jobless!! hehehe I've never been happier when saying this.

I HAVE RESIGNED!!

A beer on my table, a cig on my hand while listening to boyzone's 'Love me for a reason' hehehe

My standard clock off time at work is between 11pm-12 am. Just last friday I stayed in the office untill 8 am Saturday because the work load was just too much. Poor pinky was keeping me company while watching her cartoons on YouTube (WTF). Appreciated her company though, at least I don't feel so bored and lonely :(

Just the other day my dad was complaining saying the salary that I get is not going to be enough to pay for my medical fees next time and then went ahead to ask me to consider looking for a new job (WTF).

On another note....I was having lunch the other with my new colleague. Apparently she knows palm reading and face fengshui. So she took my right hand and the first thing that she said was 'Damn! your love life sucks!!!'. Fantastic...just fantastic....exactly what I want to hear '=_= then she went on to say that I am extremely ambitious and I will be wealthy next time but I really really really need to work very very very hard to earn it (Another blow on my face). I am also gonna die of accidents and not of health problem although I'm smoking like a chimney and drinking like a fish. Sigh....Man I need a life!

When the going gets tough....

It's 10.15 pm and I'm sitting in the office with a cigarette in my hand and a beer on my desk. I should be finishing up an agreement which was supposed to be due yesterday but I absolutely have no more energy left to think. Today is one of those days you wonder why you're doing what you're doing in this company and if it is worth it. Hell it's only been 1 month and for the past 27 days, work has not been easy.

It has been late nights every single night and even during weekends I was expected to be at events if not in the office and if I'm home, I have stacks of proposals to read. Tomorrow is a public holiday but still I have to list down ideas and strategies to promote a particular brand. It was meeting, brainstorming, reviewing, briefing the whole day and these meetings hasn't been kind to me. My boss especially, hasn't been very kind to me. Why bother placing me in a particular project when my opinions are not even put into consideration? Let's not talk about considering, but cutting me off everytime before I even have the chance to finish half my sentence and not even looking at me (as though I'm invisible) while talking when there's only 5 person in the room sitting less than 2 feet away from one another is unbearable.

Not only that work is giving me a massive headache, now I've got personal problems to deal with. I don't even want to think about these personal stuffs because work is just too overwhelming. It's not giving me even a single minute to think about other stuffs other than work.

A good friend was giving this comment late one night when she saw me still at work "Ei, do you know your mum grow misai already? Still don't want to go home aarr?? I think your mother and your sister grow misai already also you don't know. How long you never see your mother already?' To think about it, the only time I see my mum would be in the morning before I leave for work, and late at night when I creep into the toilet in her room to have my shower while she's sleeping.

With so many things happening at the same time I wonder how long I could hold on. I can't even remember the time when I actually had a proper meal. In fact, sometimes I even forget that I am hungry and there's no food in my stomach. And to think that I live by the philosopy 'Live to eat and not eat to live'

Is it all worth it?

*sob* *sniff* 'Hey....I need to talk...'

How do you deal with a good and close friend who doesn't make an effort in a friendship, but calls you and expects you to be there for her the moment she has a guy problem? I am feeling extremely frustrated by the fact that I happen to have a friend like this and that this particular friend of mine has done it over and over again and I'm allowing it to happen yet again. Why is it so hard for people to understand that their boyfriend is not the only thing that matters in their life. Think of it this way, who are you going to run to when you fight, when he dumps you or when he cheats on you? Who are you going to cry to? Who is going to be there to give you a shoulder to cry on, console and support you?

No doubt I love this particular friend dearly, but not coming out for drinks, not calling to see how you are, not willing to even sacrifice a little of her precious time away from her 'boyfriend' (notice how I place the inverted coma, because they actually broke up but she still spends time with him during the weekends at his place) to catch up is a tad too much for me to forgive her. It makes it even worse when this has happened so many times, with all the different guys in her life *same script, different cast*. And I for a fact knows, that she's taking it for granted because she thinks she can just come back to the group anytime she wants because HER friends are just too forgiving and understanding even though it has happened a zillionth times. Why are human beings becoming so self-centered and selfish?

Everytime there is a new guy, she would go missing. There'll be no phone calls from her, she'll be unwilling to come out, she will say no to all invitations to go out just to be with her man. And yet, she expects everyone to welcome her back just like that after she has gone missing for a few months and when there are no more man in her life. I would think giving an excuse such as tired and busy is really not a good reason because I know for a fact that there are people among our group who gets off work even later than her and yet still make an effort to see their friends at least once a week. I for one, works until at least 10.30 everynight and yet I would make an effort to catch up with friends to see how they are.

I remembered a time when she first broke up with one her 'boyfriends'. The first thing she did was to call us and expects us to comfort her and support her (after she has gone missing for some time again). Coincidently we were busy with our work and before we could even find out what happened we told her to hang on for a bit and we will call her right back once we are through with our work (which was only 30 mins). The moment we hung up we got a very sarcastic sms stating how we are not there for her when she needed us the most.

At the first place has it even crossed her mind how she has treated us? Calling us only when she needed us and not even bothering to check on us when she has her 'boyfriend'?

So last night I decided, after yet another invitation to go up the hill was rejected by her because she was at her boyfriend's place, that I will no longer take this nonsense. I will not allow her to take me or to take us for granted anymore. I will not go running like a loyal friend when she needs me and I will not allow self-centered friends like this to affect me and my life.

The Ultime Pointless One

Ever encountered a moment where your mind went 'WHAT THE F**K JUST HAPPENED?' And you just stare with your mouth open and HUGE question mark on your forehead. Mixed emotions playing up, you don't know whether to scream, cry or laugh. Yup, this is what I'm feeling right now, right when the entry I spent an hour typing went missing just like that. I'm sorry my new entry has to be this way, but I can't afford to spend another hour typing it again because I just have to pick the monitor up, fling it against the wall and get an elephant to step and then sit on the DAMN CPU like RIGHT NOW!